Joy Of Missing Out
JOY OF MISSING OUT: The Art of Doing Less
In order to get your sh*t together, free time to reflect and connect with yourself is a must. Doing this is difficult especially when the FOMO kicks in. Going to the bar is definitely more appealing than spending the night alone when all your friends are going out.
However, JOMO (Joy of Missing Out) can be applied when taking the night off. Taking the night off allows for time to pursue creative projects, journaling, or reading that book that has been ignored. During this time, many internal conversations will come up when external social interactions are eliminated. This free time allows you to address your thoughts and tackle the bullsh*t in your life.
Why is it so hard to enjoy a free night to yourself? Well, FOMO gets triggered by anxiety, loneliness, and social media. Knowing these triggers and having a plan of attack against them can make all the difference. Let’s dive deeper into the triggers and ways to offset them.
FOMO Trigger #1: Anxiety
When nothing is going on, the urge to do something can be so unbearable to manage. Human minds are programmed to be engaged in some sort of activity. Typically, this is why we tend to grab our phones in moments downtime to “check-in” on the digital world. Scrolling through people’s timelines can spark anxious thoughts and tidal waves of FOMO.
Ways to Deal with Anxiety:
Remember everyone only posts the best version of themselves online. Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Someone could be looking at your feed and be jealous of all that things you do. Perspective is everything.
FOMO Trigger #2: Loneliness
Being alone can either go two ways; one reaches a state of solitude (ideal) or waves of depression and anxiety come crashing down onshore. When someone is alone but prefers to be around other people, depression makes an appearance. That person who sees friends in real-time enjoying themselves on social media feels more pain which escalates the FOMO.
Ways to Deal with Loneliness:
Catch up with someone that is overdue a call. connecting with old friends and family is a great way to feel the love and cope with the loneliness. A support system is sometimes is just what the doctor ordered to get over these feelings.
FOMO Trigger #3: Social Media
Social media builds off both anxiety and loneliness. When you are alone and anxious, checking social media gives an emotional boost and escape temporarily. However, a bigger hole gets dug because FOMO kicks. Watching people's stories only causes comparison to others which is the death of joy. The only person you should be comparing yourself to is the person you were yesterday.
Ways to Deal with Social Media:
Enable screen time restrictions on your iPhone. This will make you more conscious of how much time is spent on social media. Setting time limit restrictions or completely blocking access to social media will help you gain some peace. The average person spends 2 hours a day on social media. That's 730 hours a year that could be channeled for better use.
JOMO Strategy #1 Reflect
Take a deep look into how you spend your time. What some things that are motivated by others, as opposed to your agenda. What are some habits you want to pick up and drop?
Ways to Embrace Reflection:
Journal. Freely write out all the thoughts and feelings taking place. This will provide clarity and provide the opportunity to focus on what to focus on in the future.
JOMO Strategy #2: Disconnect
Take a digital break and unplug. Be alone with your thoughts and think sh*t through. In the digital age, it’s tough to catch a break from it. Don’t ruin the party for one by engaging in social media or else the spooky FOMO comes back to harm us.
Ways to Embrace Disconnecting:
Read a book, go for a walk, workout, draw, or whatever makes you feel good as hell.
JOME Strategy #3: Reconnect
Check-in on yourself and others. Schedule dope shit to do and make it happen. Doing things that are aligned with your vision and purpose will help you stop worrying about what others are doing.
As they say in Parks and Recreation; TREAT YO' SELF!
Ways to Embrace Reconnecting:
Set something up to treat yo self. Get guacamole on your burrito. Order a boujee smoothie. Give a fancy almond latte to one of your friends. Enjoy the simple things.
Real talk, Imagine chilling on your deathbed, you won't be thinking about how you missed that work happy hour. Cmon, you see those people all day, no need to get drinks with them. Off-topic but back to the deathbed. People regret not spending enough time with their family and not working hard enough to discover their life’s purpose. Every one of us has a gift to offer to the world, be sure to share it to avoid regrets in the deathbed.
Embrace JOMO and take time for yourself.